Just a little bit

"Give a little bit
Give a little bit of your love to me
Give a little bit
I'll give a little bit of my love to you
There's so much that we need to share
So send a smile and show you care

I'll give a little bit
I'll give a little bit of my life for you
So give a little bit
Give a little bit of your time to me
See the man with the lonely eyes
Take his hand, you'll be surprised

Give a little bit
Give a little bit of your love to me
I'll give a little bit of my life for you
Now's the time that we need to share
So find yourself, we're on our way back home

Going home
Don't you need to feel at home?
Oh yeah, we gotta sing"
Supertramp- Give a Little Bit

I always enjoyed the "secular music" worship services we would try in college. They gave me a chance to reflect on faith through music outside of the normal confines of the bible. I originally posted these lyrics because I liked the first few lines as a request to be patient with me as I prepare a good post. I have been going through several rounds of thought and not been able to put any down that make much sense. So view this as one of my interludes.

The lyrics actually touch a lot deeper than I thought at first. It could almost be mistaken for a church song really. I don't know the original intent of the artists (part of what makes these experiments work for me) but I do know that they are talking about love, and caring, and two way streets, and seeing the hope and sadness in others, and the way being in communion with others can make us all feel better. And of course it touches on the subject of home. Whether that is our final home at the end of life's journey, or the "home is where the heart is," or most probably the home where we grew up that smells like spaghetti and old books where we are most comfortable. You could probably draw meaning and insight from all three.

One thing that is amazing about being so far from home is how much you realize it means to you, how much it shaped you, and how much value it can hold in your life and building a community. We grew up in a warm home, with loving parents, and a variety of friends and family that would share meals together on Sundays. That kind of home, I am learning, is harder to find these days, which makes me so much more grateful for those people who helped shape mine, namely my parents. I love you guys. A subject that has come up a lot around here is community and home and what that means or how you can nurture it. I have become increasingly aware of the people and places that I think of as home.

I have heard from some great friends since I started this journey and hope to continue hearing from them. It has been a blessing to know that people are following this journey through my blog. They have brought up questions, and encouraged my growth. I hope to address some of these and open some avenues for future discussion. Most notably I want to give a shout out to my long lost friend Chris Bailey in the cold stark library in Chicago, and Daniel Brown in Maryland as he learns how to fix big machines. I hope everyone is well and I look forward to sharing food with you someday. Peace and love.


Mike

The Holidays

BUSY! I have gone off and neglected my dear readers (the few of you that are still hanging on for some glint of intelligent discourse, I apologize.) First things first. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! I had a great Christmas and we got snow!... on the Second day of Christmas. Here is a picture of the aforementioned snow and Yamato on our mythical rope swing. That is Leander down on the ground, probably wondering what the tensile strength of that rope is (note for dad: I tested the swing first before sending my roommate flying over the void. The rope is actually four strands tied into a double loop with a overhand on a bite around a very stout tree limb, for it to fail, at least two strands would have to break.) We had much festivity and merry making for Christmas. There was a community party with a gift exchange an an impromptu Christmas pageant complete with costumes and a Virgin Mary with some shaky credentials (a married pastor from Ghana we call Uncle Timothy.) Robert and I even had our stockings hanging in my room for Christmas morning (thanks mom!)

Speaking of Robert, I had my first visitor here at ARI. Robert, my elder brother, stopped by on his way home from Korea where he taught English for the last year. He stayed for a week and we got to spend Christmas together then go on a journey to the North Island of Hokkaido (kind of Japan's version of Alaska.) We traveled by train and overnight ferry and had a roaring good time. To keep ourselves occupied we would talk, read or play one of our many games of Rummy. The weather stayed with us on the boat and met us in Hokkaido so we had snow and ice for three days, a lot for a couple of boys from West Texas. In Hokkaido we stayed on a farm run by Raymond Epp, a friend of ARI who came to lecture a few weeks ago. He invited me out to visit and offered us a place to stay. He has four sons between 2 and 14 and we had a lot of fun playing guitars and banging pots and pans, their mother even joined in and hit a plastic bucket with us. Ray is an organic farmer with a CSA (community Supported Agriculture) program near Sapporo. He is a Mennonite farmer interested in local economies and peace making through food, so we had some great conversations, and some even better food. Here is a picture of his middle son at our Sunday morning home church service. We did not get to stay for very long because of train and ferry schedules but our trip was definitely worthwhile and exciting.

We made it back to ARI for one more night before we had to get Robert to the airport. Now that the numbers have dwindled at ARI we stave off loneliness by eating a LOT of great food and lingering over the meals to talk and share stories. It is a new feel to the place but a nice small community. On the to do list is create an ARI version of Monopoly, knit a scarf, and sew my new tarp that I got for Christmas. Very exciting.

I have been learning some great lessons on loving people and being open to share time and a smile. Whenever I get tired or jaded about life I just sit back and remeber that the greatest commandments were to love your God and love your neighbor. When I come back to that center everything is easier to deal with. There is a lot of stuff going on in our lives, and in our world, if we can come back around to caring about those around us it seems more manageable. One of my good friends had a quote on her facebook wall that she got from Storypeople.com, it went something like this, "maybe love your enemies is too hard at first, let's start with 'don't bite' and go on from there." I have liked this quote since I read it several years ago. It helps me re-center when I think too hard about all the big problems and the frustrating moments in life. So for now, let's just start with not biting, and see where it gets us headed. Peace and Love.

Mike

So, the participants graduated this weekend which means that after 9 months of studying, traveling, and farming they are going back to their home communities to share their learning and excitement. They have a lot of challenges in front of them, and some of their new ideas are going to be met with hostility, but they are good people with a lot of will power. We now have over 1,100 graduates spread across the globe working so that we may live together.

It is sad to see them leaving. I have grown so close with these folks from so many different lands. We have gotten to laugh together more than our share, and shared the good work of food and life. As they leave a few at a time there is a hope that we might see each other somewhere some how. Several of them live on islands or near the coast, I am plotting a sailing trip to include stops at their various countries and saying hi, doing a little farming, and checking on their projects.

We spent the last night in men's dorm singing songs and recording videos for posterity. I will be adding them on Youtube as I get them edited, I will put links on here as well. I have been slacking on the pictures lately because I have been collecting video footage and trying to compile it into workable movies. I have a rough cut of a working video that was requested by one of my advisors at Mission personnel. So, David this one is for you...


Peace and Love

Mike

The weather has been anything but constant this week. It kind of reminds me of the swings we have in West Texas. At the beginning of the week it was cold and wet. By Wednesday it was sunny and beautiful. It has started to get a little cooler but nothing like last week. They say that it will snow sometime in the next few months.

This afternoon we took a community outing and drove to the mountains for snow viewing. Most of the participants have never seen the snow. Everything went splendid and we had a great day... except that there was no snow. We drove to a conference center that is historically snow covered, but today it was nice and green. Instead of romping through the snow we got a tour of the facilities and a buffet style lunch. It was disappointing for all, but to every cloud there is a lining. We loaded back into the buses and headed farther up the road. After much winding and weaving we pulled into a parking lot and walked down a side trail to a 30 ft stretch of three day old snow. It was awesome. Madness ensued, snow was flying everywhere. I loved it, so much excitement for a small pleasure.

Speaking of snow, apparently College Station is inundated with it right now. Who would have thought? I keep getting asked about Texas and how hot it is over there. I can't help but laugh that our southern desert state is colder right now than it is here. I know why it is cold, and that it can get very cold, but trying to explain that to someone that has never been there except through movies and T.V. is difficult. For those of you who are reading this from a warm room in a snow filled play land, please enjoy.

I hope all is well, and that your lives are merry. Feel free to leave your love. Peace, Love, and deep fried food for all.

Mike

My Experience with Death

We sent 58 birds to the freezers yesterday. It took all day to kill, cut, and clean the two-year-old layers that inhabited the F2 pen.

I don't know how to explain how I felt during the blood bath. I don't think I have prayed that much in a long time. My head swam as my thoughts try to order themselves. I have always eaten meat, it is what I do, but I had never fully understood the depth of that choice until this moment, and it all came rushing up at once. The arguments for and against, the stories I’ve heard, the books I have read. Yet, none of it made sense, so I cut, that is what you do, you cut.

It is a strange thing taking a life so personally. I am standing there, in a slatted room, with a chicken in one hand, a knife in the other, my skin trying to crawl off my back, and a queasy feeling in my stomach. Butchering puts you face to face with your eating habits, shows you the cost of your life on earth, and questions your disconnected notions about food and where it comes from. Rationally I understand that in order that I may eat meat an actual animal has to sacrifice its life. Emotionally though, as the bird and I make eye contact, there is a deep regret. At this point I just tell the bird in a soothing voice that it will be over soon. I have been repeating this phrase as a sort of mantra all day as we caught the birds in their pen, transported them to the slaughterhouse, and pulled their compatriots one by one out of the crate.

The first round of chickens were the hardest. At ARI we do not chop of the head or wring the neck, instead we slice the jugular veins in order to bleed out the bird and minimize the damage to the meat. They say that it is humane, and the birds don't actually feel much. I don't believe them. Once the cuts are made (a process that involves inserting a blade into the neck behind the airway and severing the jugular veins along the neck bone) the birds are turned upside down and put into a metal funnel to allow them to bleed out. There is usually some "involuntary" muscle contractions as the bird’s body comes to terms with its fate. After some time we move them into hot water then a de-feathering contraption before plucking and butchering the rest of what is now very definitely a carcass. At the end we have something that looks very much like what you would find in your local grocery store.

By the end of the day I was drained. I had not realized how emotionally demanding the whole process was until it was over. I ambled up the hill to my dorm where I laid in my hammock for several minutes collecting my thoughts, pondering life and my place in the grand scheme. I was surprised by how often my thoughts turned to God during this process. It seemed that I was in a state of constant prayer, trying to come to terms with our entwined fates, the chicken that would be my dinner. Two days later, I am still processing my thoughts.

I don’t like to write stories that are sad or discouraging. I don’t want you to think that I am sad or miserable. I just wanted to share my experience, that you might see more clearly what I see, and understand more fully my experiences. Thank you for taking the time to walk with me in my journey. I hope that you are well fed and happy. Peace and Love.

Mike

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! I don't have a whole lot of
time to write in this post so I have added some pictures to speak for me.

As you can see to the left, it is getting cold, evidenced by the monkey warming himself by the heater. I got to visit a school last week and play games with 2 classes of 4th graders. Did you know that they have unicycles at Japanese schools? It is an integral part of their recess time. We hiked up to a waterfall this weekend, it was the third largest waterfall in Japan. While we were there we spent some time in a tunnel waiting for an elevator to go to a lookout. After the lookout we hiked across the river and then up to the top of the falls. There were some great views of the farmland around the river that fed the waterfall. Good times were had by all.

Since Thanksgiving is not a national holiday in Japan, a group of us will be celebrating our own version of a Thanksgiving feast Saturday night. It is good to have a group here to share time with over a roasted turkey. Unfortunately due to a scheduling error on my part I am foregoing an opportunity to go rock climbing, but I know the rock will be there a lot longer than the home made chess pie.

Since it is Thanksgiving my roommate and I made a video for you last night. It is not high quality but it is the second such video I have produced. I hope you enjoy it. With that I will leave you to view some pictures and the video. Keep checking back, I would like to discuss some of the spiritual aspects of this journey. I hope you are all full and happy.

Peace and Love
Mike

The participants just got back from a two week tour of Western Japan so there has been much music and merry making tonight. We played guitar for about two hours before everyone ran out of energy. There is a Tom Wait's song called I Don't Wanna Grow Up, and it has been stuck in my head for some time now. Towards the end I looked up the above mentioned song and played it for the group. When I played the recording some of the folks asked if it was me singing (Tom Waits has a very raspy voice, as if he was raised on Whiskey and Cigarettes, and apparently so do I (aka my AC/DC voice)) So I decided I should just sing it and claim the song as my own.

It is rainy here at ARI and the trees are dripping water. This morning I was going to try to travel to Utsunomya to the Anglican Church (a 40 minute train ride, and the closes to ARI.) I could not find the directions and I was running late so it was suggested that I wait until next week. Instead I spent some time with my BCP and went searching for sermons from familiar priests online. I settled on a sermon by Father Mike formerly of San Angelo and currently located in Arizona. He used a story about his daughter's early arrival into this world to discuss preparedness and the coming of Advent, very nice. I then found a podcast that my good friend Ryan Kuratko was involved with, it was a post from December last year but it was great to hear his thoughts on Mary's reaction to the news that she would have a baby. These words of wisdom, coupled with a conversation with my roommate about church and community, were very comforting to a young Texan so far from home.

This afternoon we went rambling through the woods around ARI and into town because it was too wet for bikes. I found an old logging road and followed it up into the hills. I decided to take a non-path back and spent some time bushwhacking my way to civilization. It reminded me of my time in British Columbia and my heart was happy. I have been doing some personal study on simplicity and attitudes we can adapt for our life that will help us be more aware of our connection wide web of nature. It has been an enlightening mental journey and I have been able to evaluate my natural patterns and perceptions of life from a distance. I am learning a lot about my life and how I want to fit into this world. One of the books I am reading was published a few decades ago, but its discssions are very relevant to todays issues. It is called Small is Beautiful by E.F. Schumacher, a study of economics as if people mattered. It talks about our recent engrained acceptance of greed and jealousy as nescessary components of a "healthy economic system," and the current assumption that unlimited growth is possible in a finite world. Heavy implications but the alternatives he brings up are enlightened and promising.

Because the participants were gone for two weeks I got to spend a lot of time in the kitchen "training" for the winter when we would have to cook more often. This weekend I introduced several of the community member to the now world famous Heavy Cake. Of course as luck would have it I burned the whole thing by putting too much trust in the oven. After some doctoring and a heavy dose of icing we salvaged most of the cake. One of the volunteers was so impressed he thought the burned layer was actually a third type of chocolate. Good times. Last night I made southern style biscuits from the Perini cookbook and they went over very well with scrambled eggs. I am making my way through the kitchen and learning a lot of the standard dishes, mainly miso soup, scrambled eggs, sauteed veggies, and rice. I have gotten some good response and mild acceptance, so I consider it an overall success. Food is obviously a big part of our lives here so it is fun to be involved in all aspects of the process.

Last week, after some consultation, we decided we should put up a rope swing. In keeping with the Austin Greenbelt style my roommate and I decided it should be over a drop so you could really get the feeling of air under your feet. So we found a good sturdy tree overhanging a hill, and in less than half of an hour we had a very sturdy swing set up. We have only used it a few times and gotten a weary acceptance by the staff. Now that the participants are back we will see how it goes, I think they will enjoy it as much as I do.

Faith is a funny thing here. ARI is built and largely funded by religious groups. Every day we pray before meals and in the mornings, there is a very boisterous prayer group on Monday nights, and a shuttle to churches close by on Sundays. Most of the participants have faith traditions, some more fundamental than others. My peers, the volunteers, are a typical young adult crowd with mixed opinions and hesitant affiliations. It is fun to discuss religion and ideas of faith with the community members. We have a variety of opinions and experiences. I have shared when asked and tried to keep my mouth shut re it was prudent. It is sometimes difficult to feel like a missionary in this dormitory environment, and I often find myself saying "ok I am here, tell me what you want now." As could be expected the answer is hard to discern and mostly interpreted as love your neighbor and try to be nice. So here I sit, thousands of miles from home with with my veggies and chickens, doing what I can. I can only trust that I am supposed to be here and that by living my life and sharing it with others, I will contribute something to the lives of those that I encounter.

I hope you are all well, and that your lives are full of joy and good food. Peace Love and Merriment.

Mike